Friday, February 15, 2013

Ya Gotta Trust...

One of the biggest lessons I've learned is to lose control!  It was a big feat coming from someone who is uber-organized and was used to her "safe routine!"  As you well know, getting a cancer diagnosis pulls the rug right out from under you.  Suddenly, I scrambled to try to maintain the life and routine that I had prior to getting sick." HA-HA!,"  Life screamed back at me, "I'll show YOU how its gonna be!"
I tried to fight it but my fatigue and daily struggles got the better of me - I finally had to relinquish control and give it all up to a Higher Power.  It scared the hell outta me at first because I was so used to working hard and burning the candle at both ends and now I was lucky if I could even get up out of bed at times.  But, once I let go, I learned to trust that everything would be taken care of.  And guess what?  I found out that there were others out there like me who were on similar journeys and I allowed life to lead ME wherever I needed to be.  It's been hard, but learning to trust again has been so healing for me and now I try not to worry so much about where I am going...



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